The Tea Cosy

The Tea Cosy is a quaint vintage style tea-room which has recently opened in St Andrew's Court in Bolton town centre, in the little building central in the courtyard, where it also has outdoor seating. It only opened last month, so this is the first chance I'd had to see it, but I can't resist a tea room, so here I was! 

Walking into the venue, it's decorated with cool grey painted walls, and traditional tables and chairs, covered plastic table cloths of different designs and colours, giving it the perfect eclectic look, which also matches the mis-matched vintage crockery. Nobody greeted us, so we sat down and read the menu a bit.

The menu lists classic simple breakfasts and lunches, but also mentions things such as high tea, eggs benedict, and other tea room staples. However it, and their Facebook feed seems a little mixed when it comes to their offerings. Their image is that of a vintage tea room, but they offer things such as pizza, and fish and chips, all served on very modern style serving boards and paddles, which doesn't really go with the theme. It was nice to see a sign in the window saying that they are breastfeeding welcome. It's nice to see somewhere embracing the modern world with a sense of decency.

The counter had a basket boasting some of the more exotic blends of tea offered, allowing you to smell their aromas etc, but it doesn't mention who provides their tea. The Pear Caramel caught my partner's eye, so he ordered that. The lady serving us told us that she actually didn't like any of the exotic teas offered except the Pear Caramel. I fancied something a little more simple like an Assam or Darjeeling, but surprisingly neither were on offer, which is quite odd for a tea room. The blackboard mentioned Organic Earl Grey though, so I went for that. We placed our orders; I went for the high-tea, which was a scone, jam and cream with a pot of tea, and my partner went for the eggs benedict, which is one of his favourites. We chose to sit upstairs where there is more seating. 

Linking to what I said earlier, upstairs doesn't seem very vintage tea room either, with bright modern art pieces on the walls, and a couple of lime green sofas with grey faux fur throws over them and some cushions. More coffee shop perhaps.

10 minutes after we sat down upstairs, a friendly if a little nervous waitress brought our rattling cups and saucers upstairs and placed them with us, telling us that our pots of tea would be up soon. As pretty as the 1960s style hand-painted teapots were, we sadly were still looking at them after another 10 minutes, as it took this long before our pots of tea were brought to us, the waitress explaining that they use a kettle, and it was a bit of a pain. But we had our tea. 

My partner's Pear Caramel tea was very tasty and unusual, but sadly my Earl Grey was very unpleasant! Personal taste I'm sure, but it tasted soapy, so much so that I was curious if my tea pot had only recently been washed out with washing up liquid and had some left in it. But again, I'm sure this is just personal preference. 

The problem is that even though it took 20 minutes for our tea to arrive, we still didn't have any food to go with it. 5 minutes later my scone arrived, but for reasons I can't contemplate, it had been cut for me, and buttered with margarine! Why?! They were lovely large looking scones in the display box downstairs, but I didn't need it cutting, and certainly didn't need it "buttering", especially if I was also provided with jam and cream to go with it. I scraped some of the margarine off and spread the cream on. The cream was nice, but the jam was cheap Hartley's jam straight from the jar, and so didn't spread very well. The scone was tasty though, I definitely can't fault that. Strangely, my scone also came with a pile of squirty cream and some strawberries in it. The strawberries were lovely and fresh and tart, but the cheap squirty cream came right out of a can, and promptly turned into a bubbling puddle on my plate. At this point the friendly and nervous waitress came up to apologise and explain to us that the eggs benedict would only be 5 minutes.

It was another 15 minutes until my partner's eggs benedict arrived, served on one of those wooden serving boards, meaning the frankly unpleasant looking hollandaise sauce simply dribbled over the edge onto the wipe-down tablecloth. There was only 1 egg despite two muffin halves, and there was no seasoning or anything on the egg, just the aforementioned hollandaise sauce. EGG benedict rather than EGGS benedict I suppose. The presentation basically left a lot to be desired considering we'd waited 30 minutes for it to arrive when there was only 1 other table of people in the entire building.

This was the worst eggs benedict either of us had experienced. The hollandaise sauce tasted very much of vinegar, and didn't sit well in the stomach. The egg was both overcooked, and frightening to look at the inside of. We didn't get any napkins at any point, but the cutlery with the eggs benedict came wrapped in a bit of kitchen roll. 

No. Just no.

I could see in my partner's face alone that he was deeply disappointed to receive this horrible version of one of his favourite foods on what was supposed to be a little treat of a visit. 

When we finished, we went back downstairs to pay. The waitress asked if everything was okay, but I simply replied that I'd brought the sweetener down with us. I didn't want to tell this perky friendly waitress the problem with everything, as she was only doing her best to serve. The woman who originally served us didn't say anything to us or ask how things were, as she was now busy explaining what an eggs benedict was to the single other table that were in the building, but going on to explain that she actually doesn't like it, as she doesn't like the hollandaise sauce. Frankly if that's the only hollandaise sauce she's tried, I'm not surprised she didn't like it!

We paid up and left. The friendly waitress saying goodbye, but the woman who took our order never so much as spoke to us again after we initially ordered. Shame really, I like it when the owner (or who seemed to be the one in charge at least) takes the time to interact with their customers and their experience. 

The perfect analogy for The Tea Cosy. Looks like the real deal, but with cracks appearing underneath.

In conclusion, I love a vintage tea room, but this wasn't one, it was a café pretending to be one. The tea was nice for one of us, and horrid for another, the drinks and food took an age to arrive, the scone was cut and spread with margarine, the eggs benedict was stingy, unpleasant, and overcooked, and my partner later that day ended up with severe stomach trouble.

The Tea Cosy needs to focus on what it wants to be. Their Facebook page quotes, "Bolton's got everything except a proper tea room", but it isn't one! It's in a strange limbo between café, quirky diner, tea room or modern coffee shop, and then focus on the quality of the product they provide, and the quality of their service. Bolton DOES have proper tea rooms. I've reviewed at least two of them, including The Oxford Tea Rooms within walking distance of The Tea Cosy, and which does a much better job as a tea room, and Poppins Tearooms in Horwich, which is one of my all-time favourites. 

We were looking forward to this visit, but left disappointed. 

The Tea Cosy

St Andrews Court

Bolton

Greater Manchester

(01204) 398 061